The Parenting Lesson That Changed How I Show Love

Then I started noticing how different she seemed when we did things together. Sitting on the floor to play with dolls, cooking dinner side by side—those were the moments when she lit up. She’d chatter more, laugh more, just feel more connected. That’s when it hit me. While she likes hugs, her real love language is quality time.

Kids have their own ways of feeling most loved—and showing it, too. With older kids, you can talk about it directly: When do you feel most loved? Is it when we hang out? When I do things for you? With little ones, it’s more of a detective game. Pay attention to how they show love. Do they hand you little “gifts,” crawl into your lap, ask you to play, or just say “I love you” out of nowhere? Usually, the way they express love is the way they most want to receive it.